I’m reminded today of the old saying that “a self-made man is the product of unskilled labor.”
With that I mind, let me say that self-development is essential to your growth as a leader. In fact, it was the fifth most mentioned topic in the High Points Survey on Leadership.* Managers have a lot of questions about what they can do to improve themselves. They understand their organizations are not going to fully develop them as leaders … so what should they do?
Yes, that means you will have to take charge of your own growth. But, strange as it seems, self-development doesn’t mean you can do it by yourself. You need others to:
1. Poke you in the “I”
An article was recently shared with me that pointed out in relationships a person with a continual need to use the word “I” saw himself / herself as inferior to the other.
That makes sense when you think about it. We may consider some people annoyingly self-centered, or narcissists, which is bothersome enough, but the real truth is, down deep, they may question their own value, and be desperately seeking validation.
We need others to accept and value us, and at the same time keep our egos in check. They can provide objectivity, and balance to our extremes.
Whenever we over-promote ourselves (or get frustrated that others don’t recognize all the things we contribute), we get the opposite effect – we are seen as a weak leader.
Humility is strength. Go figure.
2. Help you see your strengths
The Pareto Principle (the 80/20 rule) explains the unequal distribution of returns (i.e. 20% of what we do produces 80% of what we accomplish).
Your strengths are the 20% that makes “you” happen. But do you even know what your strengths are?
Coaches, mentors, and friends contribute to our understanding of ourselves, by giving us the unbiased feedback we need to make changes to our behaviors, attitudes, and demeanor. They can help us improve our confidence, our focus, and the impact our interactions have on others – by leveraging our strengths. Now, if we’ll just do it.
Ask for their insights.
3. Remove your self-limiting image of yourself
Over time, you may have adopted a whole range of self-limiting beliefs. Difficulties, frustrations, and obstacles may have caused you to view your circumstances, as fixed, and unchangeable – creating a distorted view of your destiny. Your dreams faded, and you forgot what you always wanted to be.
The encouragement of others can help you renew your belief in yourself, and see your future differently. Bosses need encouragement as much as they need to offer it to others.
Find someone who encourages you.
4. The more people you get involved, the more progress you make
In this article, I’ve used “you, me, us, we, they, them, ourselves, I …”
It just means we need to get a lot of people involved, and it applies to everyone. The most skilled athletes have the greatest number of coaches.
Listening only to yourself is a poor substitute for the richness of experiences, ideas, and new ways of thinking you can obtain from the input of others. Enlist their support. Explain that you would like to grow as a leader. And accept the fact that their help will help you develop yourself.
– Jerry Strom
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This article is based on *‘The High Points Survey: What Managers Most Want to Know about Leadership,’ copyright 2012, by Jerry Strom & Company, Inc. Download the White Paper at: http://www.jerrystrom.com/js_high-points.html